Waiting

Life has become a long endless series of waiting. Waiting for this, waiting for that - everything getting pushed off to some point in the future. I am beginning to feel like all the things I've been waiting for (a vacation, a family, all the loose ends to get tied up) will never happen. I am feeling incredibly moody and depressed - frustrated and anxious. And, I just really don't know what to do to shake it.

My husband looks at this as making progress - as he spends countless hours trying to make money to reduce our debt and pay our way in the world. Problem lies in the fact that much of his time goes uncompensated. There's always more waiting. Waiting on the people to pay, waiting for him to finish the task so they can pay. It never really seems to end. And I just don't see the progress. Heck, he turned in a couple thousand dollars work of work back in February and he still hasn't gotten paid for all of it yet.

Of course, I'm just a fucking nag if I say anything about it. Running over the same old ground over and over. Still more waiting for things to come together so we actually can make a little progress.

As I said - angry and frustrated. Maybe I just just "wait" a while longer and post a more constructive post some other time. Blech!